but still it hurts I guess hurting means being alive and it’s what you do with it stuffing it kills you doesn’t it? stuffing your feelings kills you and you let it kill you because you can’t take the misery any more and you want out  all your hopes I just want us all to be together and be happy you said but that never happened did it  or it did but that was the night before the funeral and your body was cold in a box down the road jaw wired closed so it didn’t look like you that’s not me your voice said loud and clear when I wept at it that’s not me I heard I understood  we were together the night before the funeral we sat together and put music on sang along to it together your chair empty my brother with the baby on his knee we’d forgotten we hadn’t eaten for two days then we remembered and got a Chinese and demolished it me asking what was the last thing he ate? did he ever mention me ever? no   but he thought the world of you she said  yes he thought the world of you  we were together but we weren’t happy your body cold in a box  but we were united just for a while and that’s something  united in our shock and grief all together  yes before the funeral

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The Emotion Controller

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dancing

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